Photo Credit: Rohan Mutalik
The modern dating market is hard to navigate. Online dating is frustrating – many guys feel ignored.
Thousands of guys create dating profiles on Tinder, Bumble and Hinge and never get any matches. It feels like only elite attractive “Chads,” the top 1% seem to get 99% of the women.
While the rest of the men are left cold, lonely and confused.
I was researching about online dating when I found this guy named Joe Buchoff who used to be one of those men.
Joe quit college and sought out to build a business, traveling to Eastern Europe to meet with his business mentor in Lithuania.
He quickly found out that solo traveling can be very lonely. Stuck in a strange new country without any friends, Joe decided to try Tinder, Bumble and other online dating apps. His results? A cold, devastating loneliness unlike anything he had ever felt before. Rejection after rejection tore at his self-esteem. Ignored messages after ignored messages made him feel invisible.
He would sit down and wonder what was wrong with him. He wasn’t ugly, yet the constant rejection would make him beat himself up whenever he looked in the mirror. He didn’t get any attention at all from the girls on the dating sites.
Not only that, but he even tried the “swipe right on everyone and hope for a match” tactic, and even that didn’t yield any results. The constant rejection ate into his resolve, to the point where if he saw a girl he thought was attractive and not “out of his league,”… he wouldn’t bother messaging her because he felt she wasn’t going to reply anyway.
He would go for days, or even weeks, without a single match. And when he got one, either they didn’t message back- or worse, they were looking for attention and trying to get him to follow them on Instagram and Snapchat.
As for the rare ones who actually messaged back? He would find himself looking awkward, waiting late into the night at a public place for a date that isn’t coming, no matter how many times he told himself to wait “another five minutes.” With each passing second, the pit in his stomach getting deeper, he would force himself to accept that she wasn’t coming, and that he was stood up once again.
Eventually, the loneliness really got to him, until one night he cried himself to sleep in the fetal position on a stiff hostel mattress.
After going through this, he vowed never to feel like that again.
He resolved never to have to experience that pain ever again and set out the next day to figure out what exactly the difference was between the guys who got swiped right- and those who were ignored. After some research, he realized online dating is a game of who has the most attractive photos, as these create the first impression everyone gets.
With this in mind, Joe set off to get better dating profile photos. After some trial and error, he started getting more matches and eventually matched with a girl he ended up dating for the rest of his time in Latvia! They got an AirBnB together and cured Joe’s loneliness, making him happy until he returned to the states.
He’s since developed his online dating profile photography skills and used them to help more than 100 guys in over 20 cities cure their loneliness too, and be noticed by women on dating apps.
I looked into Joe’s process and found the key.
After hundreds of tests, Joe noticed that “staged” and “posed” photos, like what most men use, got the least attention on dating sites. In fact, it seemed as if the more work a man put into his photo, the less attention he got. Yet this merely scratched the surface of what Joe found.
As it turned out, the key to dating profile photography is the candid nature.
Other kinds of photographers don’t know how to do this. The subject needs to look natural. When you take pictures like this, the real, natural and attractive version of you is what comes out. The pictures look so effortless; girls can’t help but pay attention to them. It’s almost as if the candid style in the pictures is a window into your world. A world that grabs the girl’s attention and compels them to swipe right, message and reply to you.
And this wasn’t just a fluke discovery, either. As I mentioned earlier, Joe tested his findings with his friends and took the time to refine his candid style of photography until he had it down as a science.
This is a very difficult thing to achieve with clients who are not trained models – but Joe’s honed his skills and ability to make his clients feel comfortable. He has a way of bringing out the inner model in every man he’s worked with. You can see so just by looking at the photos on his website www.datingunchained.com.
Unfortunately, so many men don’t know he exists. That’s why I wrote this article. It’s important for guys to have access to this – the knowledge he’s discovered through years of trial and error. He’s seen what worked for him and then honed and developed his method by working with over 100 clients and taking well over 200,000 photos.
It’s discouraging to create an online dating profile and be ignored or stood up by women. With the right photographer, men can achieve the love life they’ve always wanted. I searched Joe’s company, Dating Unchained, on Google and checked out the reviews.
A guy named Rob wrote a gushing review that seems to sum up his experience well:
“Joe knows how to take a modeling novice and produce an entire portfolio of incredible pictures that will make a huge difference in your online dating success. Game changer, and worth every penny. Thanks, Joe!”
If you’re curious about what’s involved in the process or want to see how other clients’ online dating profile photoshoots went, check out Dating Unchained at https://www.datingunchained.com.